What a diff’rence a day made / Twenty-four little hours / Brought the sun and the flowers / Where there used to be rain – Dinah Washington
Looking back over this past year, the words of this Dinah Washington classic ring
very true. It seems hard to imagine that one year ago, almost to the day (January 10th), I had major surgery and would go on through the year to have much chemotherapy, be declared free of disease, have two more surgeries and radiation therapy, get some disease back again, feel almost better than ever, start this blog and a business.
If I thought this past year was tough, now the rubber hits the road as I begin the process of managing this cancer. Having a chemo resistant cancer that has reappeared, the balancing act begins. But it’s okay, there’s a whole bunch of treatments available. I’m not worried.
First I have to get through the bloody radiation!! So far this feels like a non-event as I’ve experienced no side effects yet. But I’m barely 1/3 way through it and do have to admit I spend an inordinate amount of time, even for me, moisturizing my skin with the purest ingredients I can find. I’m happy the radiation oncologist seems concerned about what I’m putting on my skin in the way of toxic chemicals. It gives me hope for the medical profession.
Then, somewhere in here I need to pay a visit to my gynecological oncologist for a checkup and his take on the latest findings from the PETScan. My medical oncologist wants to put me on an estrogen inhibitor because it’s de rigueur for treating estrogen sensitive breast cancer and to some extent for maintenance of ovarian cancer too. I’m good with that, but wouldn’t be against a minor surgery to take out the offending bit of cancer if that was offered to me, along with taking the drug. But now I’m getting ahead of myself. First I have to make the appointment!
Then I hope, either for my birthday (April) or for the big annual birthday bash (June) that my daughter has, to visit her in Colorado. So that’s 4-6 months away, a very doable goal unless something terrible happens which I don’t anticipate or even think about. Then there’s my annual pilgrimage to the beach in Southampton, this year hopefully with hair and some meat on my bones. But not too much as I definitely need to get into last year’s bathing suits.
Additionally, now I can see my grandsons more on a regular schedule now that I’m not immune system deficient, and market my Poofy business more. I find I’m relying more on the products myself because I like them, they work, and for the quality, are very reasonable.
Then of course there’s the whole new paradigm I’m going to embark upon for clean eating, living etc. to help manage the cancer. But that’s another blog post.
So, reading over this, I see although everything’s changed, nothing really has from pre-cancer days. I still think about all the same things, just now I do it through the lens of cancer. Money to give me more options to treat the cancer; diet not to lose weight but for optimum health; fun, because it’s what I like doing (who doesn’t?) and it’s good for my spirit, something you think about when you’re ill. Cancer keeps you grounded in the present with a little future thrown in, but not too much. You have to be flexible. Thank goodness that’s one of my few talents!
Happy 2015 everyone! Thanks for all your support and encouragement.